Dead Spokesgroundhog Walking

With the introduction of slot machines across Pennsylvania, the rise of Internet gambling and the mafia-run sports books probably rigged by Tim Donaghy, people have so many options to throw away their money nowadays.

As such, lottery ticket sales are down for the first time since 2001. Pennsylvania contributed $965.2 million to state programs for old people in fiscal year 2006, but made only $949.1 mil in FY 2007. Gasp! How will the old people — er, “older Pennsylvanians” — get their… whatever it is the state does for them?!

The lottery did not blame the introduction of slot machines for the slowdown in sales. There apparently wasn’t a big Powerball jackpot last fiscal year, causing people to not lose money to a game with impossible odds.

But this is 2007. (Or, uh, fiscal year 2008.) Nowadays, there needs to be a scapegoat for any failings. And the only possible scapegoat is none other than Gus, second-most famous groundhog in Pennsylvania Although he was apparently responsible for the upturn in instant game tickets as recently as two years ago, we all have short memories.

Sure, back in 2005 Gregory C. Fajt, secretary of the Pennsylvania Department of Revenue, said Gus was “developing this kind of cult mentality, which we just love.” But with scratch-off ticket growth slowing to just 7 percent, the lowest since 1999, it will only be a matter of time before the newest commercial shows Gus’ execution. That’d totally bring in the big bucks.

Pa. Lottery Sales Stumble [AP/6 ABC]
Pennsylvania Lottery officials credit new ’spokes-hog’ for surge in sales [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]