City Residents Soon To Be Blinded With Ads

The pay toilet that has been letting you shit on City Hall since last November will soon have a bunch of friends in town: The City of Philadelphia will soon choose from one of three companies to install street furniture in the city.

The street furniture — benches, bus stops, newsstands, honor box corrals, trashcans, advertising kiosks (sadly) and, of course, toilets — will make whichever company wins the bidding a lot of money from advertising. The city will get a bunch of money, too, which will be evenly distributed among city citizens and also given to the poor. Or they’ll pave the sidewalks with platinum and buy John Street a space shuttle.

The city did ask the companies to create a uniform look for the city’s street furniture, so all our ads will be color-coded. The company who wins the right to put giant ads in Center City will also be allowed the right to complain about Frost/El Toro and Bob Will Reign, who aren’t big companies paying for the right to put graffiti in the city.

Meanwhile, one of the bidders is a group that includes Clear Channel and two former press aides to Mayor Street. I look forward to their ugly street furniture.

Ads to adorn Phila.’s new shelters, benches [Inquirer]