Terrorist Raccoon Eats Symbol Of National Pride

Aw, remember the eagles at the Navy Yard? They had formed the first nest in like 700 years or whatever and were all set on having a happy eagle family right near where the Eagles play. They’d be, like, unofficial mascots!

Well, now they’re dead. Well, okay, only the potential eagles — eggs, I suppose — are dead, and the eagles are gone. Although I suspected a jealous Swoop for the crime, investigators now suspect one or more of the eggs hatched, but the little eaglets were eaten by a raccoon.

Obviously, right? They already have the little Repo Man masks. The eagles may return next year, so the Navy Yard won’t be able to be developed or something. Now we just have to do something about the raccoon problem.

Eagles nest at Navy Yard has failed; officials suspect predator ate eaglet [Inquirer]