Philadelphia Will Do  
 

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Elmer Smith: Old person graduates from college, newspaper writes story about it.

John Baer: Race blah blah blah blah mayor’s race blah blah blah blah.

Christine Flowers: Who kidnapped Christine Flowers and replaced her with a competent columnist?

Jill Porter: This most important part of the mayor’s race is how people feel about their moms!

Phil Goldsmith: More mothers!

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