Rick Santorum To Get Fat, Make Movies

It may be hard to believe on some levels, but despite losing his U.S. Senate seat to Bob Casey, Rick Santorum still got 1.6 million votes last November.

That’s a pretty sizable audience for the former U.S. Congressman, which only means one thing: Cha-ching! And what better way for a candidate losing a high-profile election to get back into the race than by making a documentary?

Yes, Santorum is hoping to capitalize on the success of such recent documentary filmmakers as Michael Moore, Al Gore, whoever made Spellbound and other filmmakers not pompous enough to put themselves in their own movies. The ex-Senator told the Allentown Morning Call (duh) he is planning on releasing not one but two docs sometime in the future. And as we all know from Gore’s and Moore’s recent efforts, Santorum must all gain approximately 150 pounds in order to really make a good documentary.

Both films are still in the planning stages and don’t have the necessary funding (yet). His first documentary, planned to be about an hour long, will look at the relationship between radical Islam and the “radical leftists in various countries around the world,” because the left really wants the whole world to live under sharia law.

The second doc will “change the culture of America.” I expect to be moving to Virginia and sending my seven kids — I’ll also have to, uh, find a wife to pop those babies out — to a cyber charter school in Pennsylvania after seeing this film.

“Politics and political dialogue has some impact on America but changing the culture has a much bigger impact,” Santorum said about his new role outside the public sector and his push to make documentaries. “That is what the left is doing and doing it in a big way, producing a lot of left content for Hollywood, and even not just out of Hollywood. Even independent films are now more and more left-wing driven, whether it is Michael Moore or Al Gore.”

Hmm, yes, let’s pick two random independent (”independent”) documentaries… hmm… ahh, yes, here’s two random choices: The docs made by Al Gore and Michael Moore. See, the left is making every indie film nowadays!

Moore, Gore… and now Santorum? [Allentown Morning Call]