Finally, back to real Philly

The new issue of Self magazine finally includes some news that doesn’t paint Philly as “Totally hip and 100 percent the hottest city in America!” or “Wow, Philly is kinda like New York!” And, frankly, I couldn’t be happier.

This month’s issue contains the rankings for “America’s Healthiest Places for Women” — and our fair city ranks a dreadful 88th on the list. This is good, however: Philly was 100th, dead last, in last year’s issue, so perhaps we’re on the up and up after all.

There are some supplemental categories, too, including “Best Breasts.” (There’s going to be a rush of men heading to Albany, New York, which apparently has the best bosoms in America.) And Philly took first in a not-so-hot category, “Worst Environment.” We also took home the title in 2002 and 2003. (Last year, Philadelphia was named first in “Worst Air,” which is pretty much the same thing. Know what that means? Four-peat!)

Either way, phew. I was getting a little worried that our city might actually be on the rise, thereby ruining our reputation. (Or, rather, un-ruining it.) But with this list coming out, I feel a little safer that it’s just the same old Philly.

How Healthy Is Your Hometown? SELF Magazine’s 6th Annual List of America’s Healthiest Places for Women Ranks the Top Metro Areas [PR Newswire]