With a last name like “McQuade,” it’s no surprise that I’m really excited about a coming event I got a press release for today. David Lynn, the webmaster of FreePoliticalSpeech.com, is dressing as a priest and handing out condoms at the Basilica on Sunday morning.
“In addition, the grand jury’s report makes clear that even priests are not always honest about their sex lives,” Lynn was quoted in the press release. “People who might have sex with their priests need to understand this, and practice safe sex with their clergy — you never know where their hands have been.”
Eh, you know, there’s nothing like a good publicity stunt. And there’s really nothing like a good publicity stunt that will piss off a bunch of old Catholics minding their own business and going to church. (I’ve seen a lot of angry old Catholics in my life, and it’s a fun sight.) But calling for safe priest-lay people relations? Now there’s one I haven’t heard before.
Oh, and kiddies: sadly, this free condom hand out is for adults only. But Lynn doesn’t specify if you have to be Catholic! (Or if you have to be looking for a relationship with a priest.) So if you’re a human adult and looking to get your groove on, hey, here’s a chance for some free protection.
Full release after the jump.
For Immediate Release: December 8, 2005
Contact: David Lynn, Webmaster, FreePoliticalSpeech.Com
Condoms To Be Distributed At Cathedral Basilica Of St. Peter And St. Paul Before High Mass
Condoms will be distributed to adult parishioners of the Cathedral Basilica of St. Peter and St. Paul in Philadelphia, PA before High Mass on December 11, 2005, it was announced today.
David Lynn, Webmaster, FreePoliticalSpeech.Com, will distribute condoms to adult parishioners at Sister Cities Park, across the street from the Cathedral. Lynn, who will be dressed as a priest, will be distributing condoms in order to spotlight the recent child abuse scandal in the Catholic Church.
“The lay-Catholic stance of ‘we love our faith, but we disapprove of our bishops’ actions’ is untenable at best,” said Lynn. “Every time parishioners go to worship in a Catholic Church or give money, they are supporting the bishops’ ability to shelter pedophiles, play legal hardball against survivors, and bash homosexuals. They need to realize this, and the sooner the better.”
“In addition, the grand jury’s report makes clear that even priests are not always honest about their sex lives,” said Lynn. “People who might have sex with their priests need to understand this, and practice safe sex with their clergy — you never know where their hands have been.”
Condom distribution will take place from 10:00 am - 11:00 am before the 11:00 am High Mass at Cathedral Basilica of SS. Peter and Paul, 18th & Benjamin Franklin Parkway (opposite Logan Circle), Philadelphia, PA 19103 for adult parishioners only.